Living With Loss Day by Day

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Practical ideas for coping with bereavement and adjusting to life after loss

After someone you love dies, daily life can feel unfamiliar.

Ordinary routines may seem empty, and simple tasks can take great effort.

There is no quick way to heal, but small, steady steps can help you live alongside your grief rather than feeling lost within it.

• Grief changes over time

  • At first, everything may feel raw and overwhelming. Later, sadness may come and go, often when you least expect it. These changes are part of how your mind and body gradually adjust to a world that feels different.

• Focus on one day at a time

  • Looking too far ahead can feel impossible. Try instead to think about just today — what needs doing, and what might bring a small sense of comfort or calm. Breaking time down into manageable pieces makes the future feel less daunting.

• Keep simple routines

  • Ordinary structure — meals, rest, small household tasks — helps create stability when everything else feels uncertain. Even if you don’t feel like it, getting dressed, opening curtains, or stepping outside can give a quiet sense of order.

• Allow emotions to come and go

  • Grief often moves in waves. One moment you might be coping well; the next you may feel deep sadness or anger. Rather than fighting these changes, let them pass through you. Feelings tend to ease more quickly when they are allowed space.

• Stay connected with others

  • Even short conversations can help you feel less alone. You don’t have to talk about your grief if you don’t want to — shared company itself can bring relief. Let people know how they can best support you, whether that means listening, practical help, or quiet companionship.

• Find gentle moments of meaning

  • Many people find comfort in small rituals — lighting a candle, writing a note, visiting a special place, or listening to a favourite song. Acts like these keep a sense of closeness while acknowledging the reality of the loss.

• Be patient with yourself

  • Grief is hard work. Some days you may have energy and focus; others, very little. Allow rest without guilt. Healing comes slowly and unevenly, and that’s normal.

• Reflection questions

  • What small routines help me feel more stable each day?

  • When do I notice my grief easing, even briefly?

  • What brings me a quiet sense of connection or comfort?

• If daily life feels unbearable

  • If sadness or exhaustion make it difficult to eat, sleep, or manage ordinary tasks, reach out for help. Speaking with a counsellor or your GP can help you find support and relief.

• You’re not alone

  • Many people feel lost after a bereavement, yet over time most find their own rhythm again. With gentle patience and steady care, it’s possible to live each day with more ease and carry your memories forward with peace.

If you’d like to explore how professional support can help with emotional wellbeing in later life, click to visit the Counselling for Older People page.